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Jeremy and I had fallen for each other in a very big way. I knew the rest of the world would not understand this, but sometimes it’s hard to fight feelings when you’ve been shut down for so long.
I had become shut down, quietened by the abuse. I hid my feelings. Emotions were too dangerous. I did not allow myself the luxury. If I did, the possibility of the happiness being taken away were too great. I did not allow myself to dream, to ask for things I needed.
In a way, my life, no rather my soul flatlined.